Dear Diary,
     No, I'm only joking. But I know that may end up being what this little spiel feels like. I have never been so happy....to just be alive. I don't know what it is. I just have never felt this much potential. In myself In.. my life.

    I guess it starts with the past two weeks being intense History Studies for my AP exam. I can honestly  say I have any friends after those two, stressful, terrible weeks.

     I got a job at a place called the Mariner's Mart, and it's mostly a summer job. I get $9 an hour and the job is very easy. Mostly dealing with rue people looking for beach supplies, as we are located on the highway leading to the beach!

     Friday morning was the AP test... and it went swimmingly. I feel like I did okay, sincerely, and that I may have gotten a higher grade than expected Afterwards, and I went out for celebratory Coldstone, and had a discussion about who to add onto a money. We decided the only acceptable thing would be Samuel Adams and John Hancock high fiving.

     And then there was prom. Sometimes I think I'm pretty. This was one of those nights. I wore this stunning blue dress and I just... felt pretty. I had the time of my life with all of my friends. It's 12:25, I'm listening to John Mayer, and I need to be emotional.

     When I started middle school, I was scared I was alone. I was angry. I liked to hurt myself. And I didn't know the meaning of a true friend. My friends taught it to me. I was blessed with each and every one of them- But mostly Rosina, Cheyenne and Sydney. You guys taught me to really be happy and love myself. I can't believe we've made it this far together.
     
      I can't believe I'm almost a Senior. I can't believe I'm about ready to begin the rest of my life.

     I can't believe I'm growing up.

    Speaking of, I had my first real slow dance with my boyfriend of 11 months (in 3 days) We danced to "Don't Want to Miss a Thing" by Aerosmith- one of my favorite all time songs. It was amazing. I know a lot of people don't believe me... but I think this is it for me. I know I sound like the cliche teenage girl, but you'll find I'm not quite so out of the ordinary. I've never met someone so able to make me laugh, to make me smile, to make me feel free...

     I know I've said it before, but I mean it this time! This is it. Samuel Pena is the guy I want to stay with. He slept over after Prom, then I went to work in the morning... and then I hung out with him again. I just can't keep away.

     The most controversial part of my journal. As I continue on, I ask you to remember that if you cant say anything nice, please don't say anything. I know what Im saying, and I have self control. Not that anyone's reading this... I just needed to commemorate this amazing weekend.

     "Tomorrow's mothers day..." "So?" "...Make me a mother."

      I have not engaged in activities to impregnate myself or have anyone impregnate me, I promise! I just... I feel like I'm ready to grow up already. I can't wait to go to art school, make a name for myself, be someone, do something, but... more than all that, I can't wait to start a family.

     Sam says he plans to propose between our one year and two year anniversaries... I believe him. And I don't care what anyone says.

     We make eachother happy.

     And I really do love him, sincerely.

     I'll leave anyone still reading with this, and a couple tears of happiness running down my face. No matter how rough it seems, how hard it gets, how depressed you are, how hurt you feel, you will feel happy if you get through it. If you really want to. Keep your feet on the ground, head in the clouds chin up, stiff upper lip, and most importantly-

     Never let growing up bring you down.